Skweezy and Secrets

For my birthday this year, I put together a rafting trip and rented a cabin in the wilderness and had a guys trip where we spent a lot of time trying to fart around, near, or on each other. I guess we did other things too. It was three friends and my brother, and I was ecstatic to have him fly in and join us. He’s had a rough life, but he’s doing well now, and I count every chance I get to spend time with him as a gift.... Read more →

I’m Sitting Across From Two Heroin Addicts in Starbucks

I’m sitting across from two heroin addicts in Starbucks. At this location, you need a code to use the bathroom, and that is only available with purchase. But they need that bathroom. They need to shoot up. So she bought a banana and put it on the table in front of him and he pulled out a large knife and cut it in half and said “There’s your fucking half” like he’s pissed at her about something. He’s wearing the kind of outfit that no one in the city wears... Read more →

We Need to Stop Treating Mental Illness Like It’s a Mysterious Boogeyman

When I was a kid and I got physically sick, there was always an obvious cause. It didn’t matter if I had a cold, a headache, or I was suffering an asthma attack; by the end of the twentieth century, science and technology had come so far that we no longer had to guess what caused our maladies. I could simply tell my parents what was wrong, and within a few seconds they could ascertain exactly what was wrong with me, no matter what.   Demons. It was always demons.... Read more →

Stop Settling For Yourself

As I’ve grown older, I don’t understand why adults don’t grow out of thinking that romantic love is like some sort of guaranteed right. They crash through one horrible relationship after another (or none at all) and can’t fathom why. I don’t know, maybe the fact that you’re a drunk, or have mother issues, or won’t make an effort to meet new people may have something to do with it. Wake up, do the routine, wait for the weekend, countdown to vacation, go to sleep, repeat. No changes. No progress.... Read more →

Untitled Novel. Chapter 1.

The air was still and nasty. Sticky and filled with bugs fucking in flight and smelling like rotting vegetation. Swamp air. Two police officers stood side by side outside the long-abandoned mini-mart. One cop was older. Fiftyish. Balding. Sloppy. Garrett. “That plastic bottle straight across the way,” Garrett said with a point. The other cop was younger. Not young enough to be bright-eyed. Healthy. Sort of. His name was Mike. Garrett tore into a danish. Mike chomped on a stick of jerky with one hand and hoisted his piece with... Read more →